Lessons Learned

The last couple of weeks have been a colorful blur. Somewhere in the flurry I've managed to pick up some random but important insights that ought to be shared. Here you go and in no particular order:

• This week I found out that getting a phone call from your boss at 1 o'clock in the morning is only slightly less traumatizing than death calling. Especially when the reason he is calling is because you didn't lock the doors correctly after working into the wee hours in the darkroom. It's twice as horrifying to learn that he is sitting down at the office....with the police (At this point, you'll kind of wish that it was death calling). I don't care how gracious and kind your boss is (and mine was) you'll feel like a boob for a week. You will.

• I realized this week that a seat belt's secondary purpose is to keep a person safe in the event of a crash. It's primary purpose is to keep a person like myself, from hurling themselves out of a moving car when driving for more than 20 minutes with 2 kids, 2 dogs, and Hubby Tim. Add Tim singing 'Teenage Dream' to the mix complete with weird dance moves, and the 'lock' feature that seat belts have prove to be genius.

•  And next: Did you know that it's physically possible to punch yourself in the jaw when doing speed bag exercises?! I won't explain how I know this. I just do. Moving on.

•  And finally, I learned that you're never too old to be scared to death in the middle of the night after watching a scary movie. Sydney finally talked me into watching 'Paranormal Activity', which I didn't think much of until the lights were out and I was alone with my creativity. By 3 o'clock in the morning I was so scared that I decided I was willing to do every single karate move that I had ever seen if I opened my eyes and found anything standing by my bed. I understood that there could be some unintended causalities to this decision and I wondered how I would have reacted if I had gone into my mom's room in the middle of the night as a kid expecting comfort and instead, got a swift kick to the head. I concluded that I could apologize to whomever I pummeled as soon as the sun was up, but before that, I wasn't responsible for my actions. Luckily for everyone in my household, it didn't come to that.  In a nutshell, I woke up looking like I had gone on a 3 day bender carrying around a bladder that was threatening to pop since getting up to pee was clearly out of the question (By the way, is there some sort of universal law that says that when you're completely freaked out and lying in bed, your bladder will automatically fill to the brim and then you have the added burden of deciding to brave the dark or let your kidneys shut down? It's cruel, isn't it?). Anyway, I looked and felt wrecked. There is not enough coffee in the world to undo the damage. Sydney, in contrast, came floating out of her room fully rested and looking like the morning sunshine. I could have killed her.

                 Here's a picture of us first thing that morning. Aww, I feel bad for myself just looking at it.